The egg that made up half of our conception was present inside of our mothers when they were just a fetus inside of our grandmother. While we may not have had consciousness as we know it, the building blocks of who we would become were there! We are linked to our ancestors, their DNA creating the coding that makes up our physical form; we can now trace everything from our freckles to our disdain of cilantro back to the family members who walked the earth before us. While science has yet to prove that we carry the emotional memories of our blood, we innately understand it!
Many of us are here to heal the wounds of our family line; to understand and change the broken patterns that have been repeated from generation to generation. It is not easy work, and often clients come to me at their wit's end; feeling overwhelmed and unsupported in the deep work that is required to create such change, for making such changes often creates ripples in the family dynamic. This is because no one changes in a bubble! In order to make a change in our life we shift how we interact with others, and this shift can be scary for those around us; as they begin to wonder how it will affect them. In many ways, our very presence becomes a mirror that through our growth reflects back to them the things in their own life that are broken, and some folks are not ready to look at that. Healing ancestral wounds takes patience. Patience with ourselves and to some extent patience with those around us.
I often refer to ancestral wounds as curses! Not the kind you imagine created over a bubbling cauldron, but the kind created by repetitive abuse. These curses are continuously fed shame, remorse, and deep sadness as generation after generation falls prey to the same patterns until someone comes along who says "Fuck that shit!" and chooses the hard, but rewarding road to healing.
I was thinking about how many folks are doing that work at this time; healing ancestral curses, and how this amazing act of grace is necessary if we are going to save our asses from extinction when my guide Peter spoke up. Here is what he had to say...
"You are the right chosen of your line! Not just you Sali, but all who are healing ancestral wounds. Like the champions of old, you have been chosen because you carry the strength to make the change. You carry the righteousness of knowing the pain of wrongdoing. Like the champion of legend, you are blessed!"
In my latest book SPIRIT SPEAKER, A Medium's Guide to Death and Dying I share this bit of wisdom...
Many of us understand what it means to carry on the burden of family wounding, as we experience generational psychosis, addiction, and abuse; seeing how the actions of the parent influence the child, who then, in turn, does the same, and chances are those of you who are reading this are the ones who want to put an end to the cycle! Just as we can send healing to our loved ones who have died traumatically, we can send healing to our ancestors and begin the work of breaking patterns and healing generational wounding. In fact, I believe many of us our here in this lifetime for that very purpose, to heal our family lines and create new pathways in which we can flourish. This is not done by altars alone, but through looking deeply at the wounding, and tracing it back through the bloodline, seeing why the father who was cold and harsh became so, and why his mother before him did the things she did. By tracing the steps, we can see where things went wrong, and in truth, you don’t really have to go that far back to begin the healing.
When working on healing dysfunctional patterns in our family line we first need to start with ourselves, taking a good look at who we are and how we got to be so. What traumas did we experience at the hands of our family? What patterns that do not serve us came through the influence of another? What troubles seem to plague your family as a whole? Does your family struggle with addiction, emotional manipulation, self-destructive behavior, or generational mental illness? Just as physical things can be passed down through the generations so too can behaviors. Knowing who and what we are, and where we come from allows us to not only heal ourselves but create alternative pathways for future generations, showing that we can choose another way. It also allows the spirits of our ancestors to heal.
SPIRIT SPEAKER, A Medium's Guide to Death & Dying is due for release through all major booksellers on April 4th, 2023. But you can get it early by buying it directly through my publisher. Here's the link-
For all of you out there doing the work of healing your family know that you are not alone, and know that the work you are doing now is not only those that come after you but those that went before you as well.
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